Natural-born happiness

Waking up so early it’s still dark and coming back home when it is already dark made me think the day was shrinking mercilessly. Coming out on the streets made me feel like there is no sun at all, like the clouds are all that used to be, are and will stay up there forever and on. Add piles of snow and biting frost and you will get a full picture of what the real depression looks like.

People’s eyes are mirrors, they reflect all that is outside and show what’s inside. People’s brains are smart machines, which, quite recently and regretfully, cease on working properly on their own, becoming dependent on so many things around it is inconceivable how they can function at all… the part of us that is supposed to be responsible for our self-reliance, confidence and autonomy, makes us herd creatures, things with strong unconscious ties weaving tightly around, keeping the necks from breathing, feet from walking and ass from getting up. This mirrorship is hard to dispute: most people are running with their heads bent down, stooping, awkward and in permanent worries over things they would disregard yesterday when they were kids but which are hanging like world-sized burdens on their tired shoulders now, keeping them down. It seems to be contagious – getting into an environment like this, a person who has stars in his or her eyes, has to be tight like a fresh nut to stay together and not lose the kernel. Herd mind requires mirroring. Bright gaze needs fresh air and sun…

Oh, the sun! How come so few of us realize we need you more than candies, glossy magazines and boutique shoes? I was about to add, more than sex but I guess these two should come together, complimenting each other. Sun for the day, the rest is for the night. Sun is the battery, free for us to use and as necessary as the fresh water we learned to ignore drinking, having become so darn busy lately. Think only, questions are arisen as to whether people should drink water regularly. Since when do we doubt our own needs? I guess since the moment we realized once we’ve been gods and have been kicked out of the angel’s dwelling… and since then we keep discovering things that please us, trying to get back to heaven at least in our heads…

But even this would be okay, as we, the most unique creatures on Earth, live our lives in our heads anyway. This is what keeps us going... or used to. We are getting so crazily unaware of our own selves we choose to ignore the things that help us move on. Omnipotent deities that are so careless they fail to discover they’re no longer immortal. Forgetting we need to spend the time with the sun and the air and cherish our bodies for the eternal souls kept in them. Getting things done artificial ways… when there is natural-born happiness only a step-through-the-door away.

Who made us animals capable of self-confinement? Who, if we ourselves are the gods?

Sun, I pray, hear me. I need you here by my skin.